Unwillingness

It is never bright enough when it falls on the wrong timing. It's never bright enough when you are in something out of pity for someone.

It eats you up inside, little by little. Everything you do for that matter is so unwillingly, you just hate it so much.

It's even never bright enough when you thought the person you trust most, betray your faith in him. Why don't you just be truly honest that you are upset? That you don't want me to be awol at times needed?

Just maybe, if the people were to be my family, I would willingly go. This, I never wanted this.