Monday, December 31, 2012

Opinions

Sometimes it's just hard to ask people for opinion. Because you have to somehow explain what your situation is, and  you know what you did was someway embarrassing and stupid

Guidance

You make me feel like I'm a worthless useless and hopeless child and person who cannot live alone and make wise decisions. All I needed was assistance and guidance, someone to give advice, any critics that you think better for me so that I wouldn't jump into stupid decisions. You needn't yell at me. What more in public. I actually have no clue on what I've gone into. Why am I being so ignorant

All my life

I wish to see you tomorrow, the next day, the day after the next day, and the day after that, every day, each day in my life. To see you. And to talk you. It would mean the world to me to live such life. Plainly you bring me all kinds of happiness.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Agony

If pain you give, then pain you'll get. So choose. To be content? Or to torment yourself?
"You only get what you give." - New Radicals

Dudes

I hope they're selected for this activity. They have to. Or I’ll have no fun in the world.

Friday, December 28, 2012

Loathe

But I know if I back off I’ll forever be haunted by it. I know I’ll miss all the great things that they do. I know how fun it is sometimes. Thus I ain’t letting this go. But I’ll just try to give them pain. I wish to make you regret for choosing me to be amongst you

Silly

I'm so stupid why didn’t I try to register under my new ID
maybe that’s the reason why I couldn’t get through because of the old ID
I'm so ignorant ugh

Save me?

Don't you want to save me? As bad as I want to save you from all the broken hearts? Do you want to see me in pain? Do you want me to always be in this mess? Forever? Why won’t you have that feeling of wanting to save me? Instead of feeling that pain alone?

Every word

Every word you say. I couldn't help but relate them all to me. Could it be?

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Cooking


It's actually pretty fun to be living outside, rent house. Baiduri or Seksyen 7, it's cool. To have that freedom. But all I'm worried about is FOOD. I'm never good with food. Cooking food. Ugh I fail in life.

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Hate more

You're just making me hate it more and more. Hating my life, hating my decisions, hating myself, hating everything. You're not helping me get through this. I think I'll just drop it off and never mention about it anymore

Believe

"Perhaps I would be one of the top students there.. I hold the responsibility to bring along the other students..." - Apr 6, 2009

Friday, December 21, 2012

Creepy

Being really creepy now do I

Tone down

What he'll do is just tone me up. Maybe more to the worst of myself. He couldn't be the one. I just have to stop hoping. There's no future. Period.

All I need is someone who can tone me down; and bring out the best in me. And you could be the one.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Shine bright like a diamond


Geez lord I can't forget how you randomly sang out this part of the song when I mentioned it (or maybe we heard it somewhere and you instantly sang it)

And you knew how much I like this part.

It's just the simplest thing that happened. But it meant so much to me. Such memorable moment.

You listened


You were different. You listened to everything I was saying. My stories. My life. The things I randomly tell. You listened and not being bored.

I made those random accents. I got crazy again. It was all spontaneous. How did I even

You have changed a bit. But those butterflies, they were not there. But still, you changed.

Haunted

There are so many kinds of secret that you can't blame one for not telling, even if you're the closest person they have.

The first destruction of my friendship here will forever haunt me and rub on my face. In which I have to face it everyday in my life. I wish I could unknow those people. I wish that I never attempted to be close to the whole group. I wish that I could get away and start a new life, a life where I don't try to be close to people. Another 2 years is a very long time. I don't know if I could bear with this.

Until forever, they could never see how I really appreciated everyone. But still, I am no good to anybody. All I could bring is just destruction. Just..try to leave the past behind, dear.

Presence

Having the chance to hang out or go for a road trip with them is always such awesome thing. But it's different if you were there. Because well, you know, when your crush is there, it makes the world even brighter.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Scent

You have this pleasant scent, spread from your perfume all over your body. The scent that whenever I sniffed it, I know that it’s you.

And if in places, wherever it is, unconsciously sniffing this scent, it reminds me of you. With just this scent, it reminds me everything about you and me; every bubbly feeling that you made me feel.

‘Cos I’m falling hard, really hard.

Mum

“Mak ingat dah takde budak kecik nak dijaga, ingatkan semuanya dah  besar. Ghupenye ada lagi budak keciknye.” - Mum
Hahah mum is so cute. They left me here and went overseas. I had no one to talk to. And I was a mess, really. I still needed my mum. And now they’re back, I shall cherish every moment with them. Moga panjang umur, mak, ayah.

Best for you

Your best friend from school. She has always been the one. The one who's ready to listen, to calm you down, to be happy for you, to accept you just the way you are and never judge you. She's a true friend. I don't deserve you, you deserve better.

But know this:
Losing your best friend is like losing your life.
 I really had no one. But I'm just glad you were part of my life.

So-called family

I hated to be called as a family in organizations. Like BWP? And this I'm currently in. It's foolish. I never felt belonged.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Taken

I didn't feel it. With him, I didn't feel how you made me feel. It's obvious to me. That my heart has already been down to only you. For you.

Feel again

'Lets pretend we never met each other so that I'll have the chance to meet you again and feel the pleasure.' - azrjml

Have I mentioned that friendships or relationships are like rubber bands.
Stretch a rubber band, it'll eventually bounce back to the original condition. But if you keep on stretching, it will eventually break.
You just have to pull it so far, till it couldn't go further. Be distant from each other, until there's a time, when you most long for that person. But don't let it break.

You just want to fall in love again, and feel again. You want to feel that sparks again. The butterflies that you had. Those feelings. You don't want to feel numb.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Discover

You were invisible, unknown of your existence. While I was always only behind the camera, unnoticed.

And now we have discovered each other. And holding on. We're holding on.

Moderate

"Korang rapat lagi ke?"
Takde la rapat sangat. Macam tu je. Kalau special occasion ke apa ke, ada la invite. Nak kata kitorang cerita, pasal our whole life, takdela sangat. Biasa je. We're the normal kind of friendship. Not best. But moderate.

It's good

Know what I do when a day go by without talking/texting/chatting with you? I reminisce those moments with you even I were in the sea of a crowd, the people I know. I just spaced out, most of the time. You mean this much to me.

It's okay, it's good.

Missing

A day without you is just so unfair. And yet it's the best for us. Mostly for me. Sometimes too much of anything can make you sick. I don't want to feel that. Better let me go missing you like crazy.

Good night, darling.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Hope

Even when you told me not to put hopes too much.. that only has given me hopes

Friday, December 14, 2012

Needed

It's great to feel liked by the person you adore. Some people don't get that feeling. So what more do you want? Is it not enough?
Manusia memang tak pernah puas sepenuhnya.

Just have fun and cherish what you have while it lasts. DON'T let it be dull. Make it JOYFUL. Things are how you make it to be.

Hando


She offered me her hand to hold. I felt loved. From a kid, from a lil sister. It was something so beautiful. Given that I've never had a little sister. It was mesmerizing. We talked different languages, but love, is one language. And I understood that, I felt that. If they ever knew how they really changed my life.

Easy

When things become too easy for the both of you. When there is no challenge whatsoever. Life is just no life without risks and challenges. It becomes dull and uninteresting without the two. Sometimes you could feel yourself trapped in this so-called affinity. It's like your market dropped down drastically. And that's as if you were that high in the market. You see, you miss the challenges and being stuck between things you couldn't do to get what you want. Because with that, you just have to try harder, try new ways to get it. You've been through that. But now when you already have it, you thought, is this just it? Is this all?

The worst part is, you're starting to lose faith in your future with him. Nevertheless, this is not an affinity, you have clearly stated that. You are still only mates and no more, as you've wished to.

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Unstable

At times when I feel like I'm no one to you. It's like you betray my trust. All the trust I've given you. I'm upset.

Do I bore you? Do I come about so easily? That you needn't to put an effort to see or talk to me?

Overrated

Sorry, but the term best friends is too overrated.

This is no way an offence. I'm just always insecure with myself. But 'reaally close friends like sisters'. I love that.

Friday, December 7, 2012

Changes


I know. The people could see the changes between us. The girls. The boys. We've grown apart. You make plans where I'm not in it. You didn't even consider that I've asked you out earlier.

When I asked, the both of you didn't even try to ask me to come along.

Finally, the thing that I'm most afraid of has finally happened. We've become strangers.

Fulfilled

Isn't it irony that you fulfilled my check list on a guy? You're kind of the dream guy whom I always wanted to be with.

Monday, November 26, 2012

Push you away

What am I doing..am I pushing you away? If I ever seem to push you away... maybe, I'm just afraid of losing. I don't want to lose anyone again. Especially you. It hurts.

Snapped

I still remember... how I snapped at her. In Tokyo. Like literally snapped, blew over the top. Just because she  didn't get the picture right. I sensed her anger. I felt guilty. I apologized straight away. I mean, who else in the world did I have back then? Especially in Tokyo? It was only her. I couldn't lose her. I couldn't stand the coldness even for 5 minutes.

And the best feeling is she forgave me. And we were back as usual, telling me not to do it again. I promise I wouldn't snap at her out of the blue. InsyaaAllah, I still won't.

I should have done the same with you. I knew that I snapped. I could feel it. I should have just said sorry straight away. Why didn't I see it? Oh dear... you never know how sorry I am, hurting you.

Twitter

Life before the likes of you having Twitter was so much more interesting. Yes I dislike seeing your fondness. Because I couldn't be a part of it. I never was. I never did. Reading the tweets even in this virtual world, it hurts. But I've always been amazed and happy for you of how happy all of you can be. I understand the happiness, because I couldn't help but smile, when seeing your happiness.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Side of your face


You know the pictures of handsome celebrities? Which in particular CLOSE UP pictures of the side of their face? That they still look so beautiful even when you see the side of their face?

Amazingly, that’s how I could see it on you. You are just so beautiful. I think I'm blinded by your beauty.

Knowing

Knowing you're going to read this and rape the refresh button... I can't help but being stuck with what I have to write. But still, I've nothing to write so far.

Stay tuned.

Love, really?

Even the exchange of saying 'I love you' between girlfriends is not always real.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

No do overs

Perhaps this is the end of every close friendship I made after MRSM. I realize I don't deserve to be close to anyone, when I'll only hurt people. I was always the cause of the ending of my friendship with others.

It's better if I just stay away from being too close to someone. I don't deserve close friends. They're better off with someone else, whom are more true than me.

I guess, relating to my previous posts, starting over is never an option with them. I should stay away.

And another post, walls up.
That I should not be close to anybody here,
and that I should not let people in.
I should be careful to whom I share with.
I should be careful to whom I open my heart to.
You just can't afford to hurt someone or get hurt again.
You just can't.

Run away

I couldn't stand it. I hated seeing you and your happiness. I used to laugh with you, not see you laughing with others. You're just so happy, you couldn't see the pain behind this smile. I'm still hurt. Just seeing you could destroy me. How painful it is that you just left it unsaid and pretend like nothing happened.

It's better if I just get away until the exam comes..

Dependent

I realize, I'm becoming more dependent on him. Depend on him to understand me how I wish he'd do. I shouldn't be this way. I'm still so young I need to learn how to be independent.

Don't let people have the easy way on you, especially him. Sometimes he needs to figure things out himself.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Not again


What happened between me and her, I don't want it to be happening between us, you and me. Please.

Push

Some relationships really need a push, huh?

Longer

I know it'll take longer than how I think it would. Longer time for us to be like old times. But seeing you changed for the better, I don't know already how you see your life back then when it was with me and the boys.

If your perspective on that life has changed, then I think it's impossible to get back to how we were. Ah yes, nothing's impossible. But that's how I just see it.

Just know, dear, that I'm glad everything beautiful and sorrow that happened, it was with you :)

Saturday, November 17, 2012

No one

Tak perlu kot jaga hati aku. Aku bukannya sesiapa pun kan.

Friday, November 16, 2012

Platonic love

Definitely platonic. Things you'd do for the most beloved person. Yup.

Smile

Cos people love to see me smile.
Especially you (:

Thursday, November 15, 2012

In the meantime..

While we were getting distant from each other, I had my boys. Or our boys. Because of them, I felt like I had no problems in the world. Yes, guys are like that. They don't see problems as a big deal.

I became close to the person I thought I'd never be. I wanted to tell you, but at the time, it was cold between us. I only had him, and the boys.

The fact that I always hang out with them, I lived the way they do; I forgot my sorrows. I forgot the people who are more important to me (not the boys' fault). Which is you, and my girls.

Nevertheless, with that being said, maybe our being-distant has a reason behind it. There's hikmah in everything that happened. For what I see, for myself, it's the chance to see if he really cares.

Whatever it is, always see things in a positive way.

Worthless

Try feeling how it is when people refuse your offer.
Try feeling how it is when you got ditched.
Try feeling how it is when you're being ignored.

Solved..

Alhamdulillah. All I had to do is apologize and tell how sorry I am. I don't expect that it'll go straight away back to the climax of how our friendship was back then. I know this kind of thing have this healing process.

It'd be like how we used to be when we first tried to get to know each other better. Start fresh? I don't mind.  As long as this friendship still goes on. And perhaps better than what it is before.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Connects

When we're far apart. It's hard to meet. But good gracious, it's a modern world now. We have various social networks to contact each other. It's hard to explain things. But still, at least I could relief some agony just by telling and you listening/reading.

Yes, you should tell Allah. He's the first person you should go to. But human nature, we need comforts from other people. It's human nature.

In fact, those who listen, may be the persons who He sends to you, to help you.

I'm so glad to have you always be there, be it online or offline, to listen to my problems. Thanks dear friends.

Two months

Two months since the fight. And you still hate me. I did say I'm sorry. Why don't you see through every sincerity of friendship I'm offering to you?

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

How

Sometimes I wonder how the heck I'm close with the people I am with now? It has always been me, when we have a conversation. I hardly pay attention to what people say. How could people love me? When I'm just too selfish?

Fake

In the end.. they are the ones who stayed. And I'm the fake friend who doesn't.

When I asked you, "When a friend suddenly keeps quiet, would you go and ask her directly? Like, what happened to her? Did I do something wrong? Would you ask that way?"

That, was actually for some other friend. That feeling to you wasn't that strong. But now, it has gone worst. I hate this.

So you answered, "Well it depends. Maybe she has changed? That she is not how she used to be with you before?"

How deep is that? Indirectly, I think you were referring to me too. And I think you felt as if what I asked you, was for you. I didn't realize I was doing that, till now.

I couldn't ask a thing about this. I couldn't live by my principle: "When something felt wrong, just ask straight away." I couldn't. Because I'm afraid, I'm a coward. Just like how I used to be back then with my previous room-mates. Why am I this way?

I miss you :(

11.11.12


So many things to say. But I'll just keep it.
For now, have a great birthday c:

Never a cheesy pick up line

I don't let him make a pick up line on me. And I never want to try to do it to him. Because in the end, I'll feel so disgusted with this mushymushy stuff that it became too much.

I'm afraid that in the end, I'll tell him off, like how I used to previously. Then I'll regret. I don't want to lose anyone. Not again. Once is enough. I hope this would turn to something better.

But time and again, if he really means it, I might take it positively. Lol.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Don't do what you don't want people do to you

Ditched. I pity my friend because if I've left, it'd be like I ditch her. Instead, I stayed.
But in the end, I'm left alone. Sad. Yes, I am.
But to think back, I can bear with going alone. It's not like I never went home alone. Going to this certain class uses the same route anyway. So why not.

Just be strong. It's okay, dear. It's okay.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Put aside the hatred


Dear, when you feel like you hate someone of your own religion, remember, that she is your saudara se-Islam. Forgive her/him for what they do. Look at them with the perspective of love.

Yes there are people who are of annoyance, but when you think back, what have they done to you? What wrong did they do? Mostly nothing. It’s just one of the littlest things that annoy you. It doesn't top off your friendship with them.

Dear dear, value your friendship. Put aside this hatred, this loathe. Please don’t let it get to you.

Friday, November 9, 2012

Walls up

I've decided. I don't want to be close to anybody here. I don't want to let people in. Nobody. It would just hurt too much.

All the world hating you

I know they're mad. I know they're angry. I know, that they are holding it in, sabar dengan kerenah ni. Tapi sebenarnya api kemarahan sangat membuak-buak.

But. I've devoted to myself that I don't want to go outstations. And you know that. You know.

Two person


I've let down two person. Two of my close friends. And it's a big disappointment. Starting from now, I know that we will never be cool to each other again. I'm sorry for being selfish... why am I this way?!?!?!

Monday, October 29, 2012

Dear how I miss you

I miss how you could read me like a book.

Was I too selfish? How did we become to just... friends? We were so close. We did everything together. We helped each other out. We told things. We tried not to have guilty or anger kept inside. We were crazy together. We get crazy together. What went wrong?

Everyday I see you, everyday in the room. And yet we're still so far away from each other. Like strangers.

And what I hate most is the fact that I couldn't get myself to joke around with only you. I'm good with others but when it comes to you, my soul, myself, shuts down, build up a wall, so that you couldn't get to me.

I hate the fact that I do that every time you're near. I don't know what this feeling is. From how I see it, I have become the fake friend who doesn't stay. Was I using you all this time? Is that how you really feel? Am I treating you like a once close friend of mine in school?

Or am I just the person who just couldn't get it together when we're not in the same class and such?

Of all that matter, I think you're almost perfect, that I have this huge envious feeling of you. You are as perfect as Atul is. I wonder, if I ever still be in the same school with Atul... I wonder if I could survive? Because I know, before I left, even till now, I have that envious feeling of her. I know I should not. But I couldn't help it. Atul knows this tho. I try to persuade myself to not feel that way, but I do. I think, if I ever still be the same school with Atul, our friendship would be on the line. I think we would be like how I am with you now.

It sucks, that I don't see how important you are in my life.
It sucks that I don't appreciate you being a part of my life.

Why do I push you away?
It has been months, and I still could not get the answer.
And dear, I really do miss you.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Familiarity

I'm highly thankful the fact that I'm okay with our advisor even before becoming a member of the organization. Communicating with her is easier and not much awkwardness because I know she knows how I am.

I like her c:

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Unwillingness

It is never bright enough when it falls on the wrong timing. It's never bright enough when you are in something out of pity for someone.

It eats you up inside, little by little. Everything you do for that matter is so unwillingly, you just hate it so much.

It's even never bright enough when you thought the person you trust most, betray your faith in him. Why don't you just be truly honest that you are upset? That you don't want me to be awol at times needed?

Just maybe, if the people were to be my family, I would willingly go. This, I never wanted this.

Could we really be?

When my friend thought we were siblings, while looking at this certain collage of us, I couldn't help but to think that we were meant to be together.

Like this certain 'fact' about those couples who look alike or better, look like siblings, tend to get married, happily ever after.

Even our teacher's kids in tender years of 8 and younger, proclaim that we were siblings. People questioned about us.

With just that, it has been running vividly through my mind. And yet you still never want me the way I do.

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Hidup memang palat

Tetapi kadangkala hidup ini memaksa kita utk jadi terpaksa . RT Jangan paksa seseorang itu jika dia tak mahu.
- IK

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Who'd come


I thought I was the only one to feel nervous about the open house, to feel nervous that my friends are coming. Turned out that Hannan was feeling the same. Haha.

So it’s normal I guess

Overall, I’m just so touched for today. ‘Coz it’s like satu kampung datang rumah. People enjoyed and it went well. Alhamdulillah.

Friday, August 31, 2012

Invites

Remind me to invite everyone. Lol. I feel bad somehow.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Those random times


You know, sometimes you can’t say you’re alone. You can’t say you have nobody in this world. Especially saying that publicly, that the world would know.

Someone close to you, might get hurt. At least that person thinks he’s close to you, when you’re feeling like shit.

When they see you be that way, they’d be like, “Why the heck would you say that? Don’t you think I’m your friend? Don’t you think you can count on me? Aren’t I not good enough as a friend for you?”

Well, I don’t know. I have felt the feelings from both sides. That’s what I think. But I still think I’m the awkward lonely potato. I just… am hopeless

Worthless

I feel so worthless. Among my friends from anywhere. Among those except my family.

Yes, I feel belonged to my family. Of course. That’s definite.

But friends. I feel like I’m nothing. Sigh

Friday, August 24, 2012

Self-anger

Aku berang, dengan diri sendiri.

Why in the world do I not have the mood to meet people? To meet my friends from hometown (Kuala Lumpur) whom I seldom see? Especially who's gonna study out of town? WHY THOUGH, WHY

I feel like a douche bag. Really. Likewise, I'm so upset that I am not invited to any hang outs here, that I ain't included in a plan. Sucks, no?

No blame put on my buddies, though. You only get what you give. You'll be treated like how you treat other people @ Treat people like how you want to be treated.

In this case, I treat them bad. Never cared to ask if they are free. I just waited. And when asked, I replied as if I don't wanna hang out at all. What seems to be the problem here I wonder.

I think I'll be so full of regret in the near future. About this.

Writing this, I am still lazy to meet anyone. I just want to sit at home and not care about the outside world. Till the class starts again.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Listen

When someone tells you something, about their life, listen. Be a good listener. Focus. Stop doing something else. Let him know that you care. That you are interested in what he has got to say. Which you actually do.

People won't tell twice about their life especially sensitive ones. And it's weird to ask back what a person told you the other day.

It's like you didn't even pay attention to him. It's like you are just using what he has, to your own benefit.

Don't do that. That's rude. And all you wanted actually, was to spend time talking with him.

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Bond of the unity

Most people who we are close with, are with those who we always spend time together. Once again, I feel belonged. I feel like I have a family here. That I needn't worry if I came back here. Because I have them.

What I felt with my dear 5A classmates, I feel that again, with my dear batchmates. Last night. Last night proves it all.

When we recited a Jamaah prayer, I felt the bond between us. The bond is the strongest when it is for Allah. It always has been, when it is for Allah. It's like we're bringing each other to a better place, a better level, to be better persons, because of Allah. Lillahi Ta'ala.

Not bragging, but I am most proud with my friends. Such noble hearts deserve good friends. Who they are outside between us differs a lot when it comes to facing Allah. Of course, right? Put aside all those annoying teases, when it comes to salaah. Everyone has good hearts. No doubt that we connected through Allah. Allah eases every pain.

Having them along, reminding about Islam, especially prayers...you are just so lucky to have them. Some people drift away from the right path. But fate brings us together closer to Allah. Wherever we go, we always think of salaah. Never that we intentionally forget about it, for instance by not mentioning it to each other.

I understand how Atul feels about her UM friends. When she only feels it once, I had it twice. Sejuk hati bila ada kawan lelaki dan perempuan sebaik ini. Yang lelaki lagilah, dipandang tinggi bila Allah diutamakan. Just because it is hard to find guys like these nowadays.

They may be different from what they appear last night. They may be different if it were to be at other places. But when we are together, that was how it is. Good hearts, showed through salaah. Because there is potential.

How I am so grateful to have them in my life. Once again I feel belonged and not a stranger with no friends. Wherever you are in SA, you could ask for them, fgs a big circle of GOOD friends. When you are in need, you could ask for help. Always. At least that's what I think.

The fact that Puan Roszana is present in our life, brings more light to this friendship. It's like Abi to 5 Amanah. That's how Puan is, to us. And here I thought I'd never feel that again...

You know what we should do? Spend more time together. Do more activities together. Like how my brother's 'Weekenders Club' does. Be'es said that it's good. Because after you graduate and start working, it's hard to meet up. People with different life, place... we're just in separate ways already.

Perhaps I'm getting too emotional about this. But don't you agree? Don't you feel it? We can work it out, in between the class schedule. No force or whatsoever. But we try to make something.

I am so touched by this bond between us. If feels good. It feels right. Put aside all the hatred, all the grudges between us. Because I value our friendship that much, that those petty silly things should not be dragged till it ruins the bond. When you see it the other side, positively, you'll see there's more happiness than just darkness.

When you put away the black ones, you'll see... girlfriends or boyfriends.. they give you joy, even by different ways. Whenever you feel contented, that's the happiness you feel.

In another couple of years, insyaAllah, we would still be together, united as how we are now, and not separated by bad things, or bored of each other. No, insyaAllah.

Friends do get bored of each other tho. I mean, you see them everyday, and go everywhere together. But then, we should not feel so tied up to this. Just relax, be with anyone, but in heart, we know who we are.

InsyaAllah, with a good intention, brings good unity.

Friendship, a hardwork

I am a bit upset with my friends. It's so hard to meet up for iftar. But time ang again, we are in separate ways. It's hard to have the same holiday. It's difficult. A friendship with them is an absolute hardwork.

But you know what's great having them? We are from the same place. During holidays, we are at the almost same region (at least, before we marry someone and settle down). That, if in the same time of holiday, it'd be easy for us to hang out and meet up.

This rare occasion of meeting up - it's a good thing. It's like, when we finally got to meet up, we'd use the best out of it. We appreciate the meeting. As though we'll never see each other for a long time, as though the next meet up is when we have kids.

So. If not in Ramadhan, in raya we'll meet then. After all, it's the last 10 days of Ramadhan. I don't wanna ruin it for anybody even for myself. Perhaps we should focus more with akhirah right now, rather than dunya. InsyaAllah this sacrifice will bring to good things.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Sometimes you try to catch up with your friends, of the changes they’ve become

and you try to fit in with the changes, but you it’s so hard to understand, you just give up trying to fit in.
And in the end, you just let it be..

Immortalize moments

Immortalize moments by any way possible, writing, taking photos, because all the moments worth every second you lived.
Sometimes you might want to remember exactly how you felt back then.

Like, how a person staring at you. How you reacted to someone’s words. Someone’s expressions. Someone’s comments.

Ustaz Ghafar once told us,
“Tulis la semua benda yang terjadi dalam hidup. Ingat tu memang ingat. Tapi takdelah ingat macam kita mula mula ingat. Tulis la untuk cerita kehidupan..”

You know, every single smallest tiniest the most irrelevant detail, those things, immortalize them. It's your choice.

When you’re having so much fun with your friends, when you’re too attached to them, you just don’t wanna let go. You just don’t wanna go, to separate to your own ways. 'Cause if you do, you’ll feel so lost in a place you’re not familiar with.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Have some changes

I want to increase my skills in photography. Well not actually skills, but some new.. well I think it's called a skill. Lol whatever. Anyways, new things to learn :-
  • Bulb photography
  • Levitation
  • High speed capturing images
  • Some skills with the speed light
I'd like to try some. Just a hobby, or things you do in free time, to release stress.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Don't stop once you've started. Don't give up when you're halfway there.

If it's your passion, if it's what you love, if it gives you joy, do it. Go with it. Don't stop. If it's what you have been wanting to do, to achieve, do it. Regardless your intention to show to the world, to entertain people, but it's for your ownself. For the sake of your own joy. Don't push away your little dreams, with the little effort you made for the first time, go to waste. Don't let your failure to do how it is supposed to be, get in your way. Just remember that practice, improves whatever you are doing.

Monday, March 12, 2012

Tears

They never fall for any guy but you. No one, but you. Perhaps I'm just tormenting myself with sweet moments we used to have. Because I am sure as hell you didn't make me as happy as I with back then.

With that being said, I'm back to my happy self. No mourning on the past.

Feelin' like a newborn

So far, everything falls into place. I couldn't have thanked more to Allah for everything I have right now. My girlfriends and boyfriends, I'd never wish for someone else :)

FREAKS