Jun 27, 2016


There are two people who I look forward to see their names appear on my notifications. My junior and my guy bestfriend.

Jun 26, 2016


I always say to myself, budak-budak sekarang ni, berfesyen macam dewasa dah. When I was their age, I didn't get the privilege. And even now, I don't wanna dress up as a lady. I'm a kid. I'm a kid.

But then, you can't have that perception because time is ever-evolving. They grow up in different surrounding than yours. You can't blame that for who they are. All you gotta do is guide them. What's more important is to make them see and judge for themselves on what's good and what's bad.


Seeing my junior getting excited to embark in so many events, it reminds me of Ainaa too. To make themselves busy and occupied. And the bonus point is, they are excited about it. The challenges, the pressure.

I had it. But I know I don't want it as much. Like, simplest example: working. Occupied, stressful, busy. Enough for the things I need to go through with work. I can't make myself involve in other stuff.

I'm too passive that I think it doesn't help my self-growth, which is so wasteful for me. What more that I plan to settle for less after marriage. Settle for what I could more with the experience and qualification. Sad isn't it?

But I do hope I would find a way to help the ummah...

#342 makeup on wedding day

I'm so undecided about make up on wedding day. Do I want to shape my eyebrows? Do I want fake eyelashes? Do I want enhanced concealer that in the end change the colour of my skin? Do I want contouring?

On the wedding the day? Which only once that my spouse to be will see me makeup. But there could be other option. I could wear makeup other days at home just for fun. Just for him. Like how some old arabs do (or still do). Berhias kat rumah. 

I know for a fact that it would look good on me, heck, on anyone. Duh it's makeup. So do I need to prove that on wedding day? Nikah day? Engagement day? 🙄 *rolls eyes* 


When your friends social networks are updated but then you know something's goin on so you don't dare to ask personally, you'll just have to assume what she has been up to lately

It's a sad case

Jun 24, 2016


Come to think of it... I guess my presence wouldn't make a difference. Because I barely talk, I just laugh... Except when they ask me something

I've been living by myself too long


Please remember not to feel butthurt when you're not invited to a hangout even if where they go is so close to your home

and when you thought you're easily remembered (like it's so close to your home!), please don't be too positive because you're not. Don't go tak ajak! Don't go weyyy dekat je

and do not forget that you chose to be silent and isolate yourself when all they did was giving each other support

Why am I feeling so dejected

#338 equation

I guess there is no me in every of your equation

Maybe I never belonged

Maybe I'm just tagging along

All this while

I'm sorry

#337 aib diri sendiri

"Hide your sins: Prophet ﷺ warned: “All of my nation will be will be forgiven except for those who make their sins public”."

Jun 22, 2016


You know there is actually something called tipu sunat to jaga hati orang......

Even if it's Ha....
Even if it's your close friends especially.....

I think I will just choose to be this lonely again even after what I've gone through in university....

I'm bad to think my friends think badly of me like why can't I bersangka baik...

But I just feel so left out. Mad might understand so well of this hm



It was what I chose. And this is true... Allahu


I asked my cousin Din about this. Said that ada banyak pandangan. And he told me a new pandangan that I haven't found on google.

And it's something like manusia pun macam syaitan juga, sebab berbuat dosa. And I found this blog which says almost the same thing.


"Manusi sendiri mempunyai hawa nafsu yang boleh menyebabkan kita melakukan pelbagai perkara maksiat. Bellakunya sesuatu maksiat bukanlah hanya disebabkan hasutan syaitan semata, tetapi dikait rapat dengan hawa nafsu manusia yang kotor. Ada orang cakap, selama 11 bulan nafsu berguru dengan syaitan, maka sebulan tanpa syaitan pun sudah boleh menjadikan nafsu itu raja dalam diri kita.Maka, dengan itu.. renung-renungkanlah. Segala maksiat dan kejahatan datangnya dari diri kita yang hina ini juga. Jauhkanlah sebaik mungkin, dengan hanya menyucikan hati InsyaAllah Nafsu yang selama ini tunduk pada syaitan akan beralah lalu menuju ke arah kebaikkan."

#333 sharing

You know what? I think Imma start sharing my thoughts on certain things on Twitter so that people could engage in a discussion with me. Either constructive or destructive, it's cool. Coz the knowledge I have are not necessarily correct. And people have different views.

#332 Hugging bf vs brother

Jun 21, 2016

#331 friends

You know what sucks lately? That I have to be the friend that goes like, it's okay she won't terasa, she will understand, she will be around. Because they have to layan the one that if they don't layan, s/he will terasa and bother them and ruin their friendship.

Okay so maybe they don't think of me that way but yeah whatever.

I guess I'll just be here.
Oohhh here.

#330 sedekah

I can't remember where I heard this from but I think it was from ikim fm. It's about sedekah. Dia cerita yang sekarang ni senang nak sedekah. Online je. Transfer je. Tak payah susah susah nak keluar. Bagus kita dapat sedekah.

Tapi dengan cara ni, kemanisan bersedekah tu macam tak tersampai. Sebab bila kita beri sedekah depan depan, kita dapat kesedaran untuk lagi bersyukur, setelah apa situasi yang kita lihat di hadapan kita. Kita dapat rasa empathy terhadap orang yang kekurangan. Dapat bagi sokongan depan depan kat diorang, bukan hanya sekadar duit.

Writing this made me think of giving money to your parents. Aku teringat akan drama drama pasal anak bagi duit tapi tak meluangkan masa bersama ibu bapanya. Apa yang ibu bapa rasa? Kekosongan. Duit kau tu tak berguna bagi diorang. Diorang nak kasih sayang kau, yang lagi penting.

Macam tu lah juga situasi dalam bersedekah kepada yang kekurangan. Kita beri kebahagiaan kepada mereka. Show that we care. Tu la bagus kalau kita sertai program program pasal sedekah ni, bukan sekadar memberi wang sahaja.


#329 road etiquettes

A man literally rolled the window down and yelled 'Hey bodoh!!!!!' Because we were kind of blokcing the road at the round about but sir, with all due respect, kau expect aku nak stop tengah jalan dan halang kereta lain?? Ambik la space kat blakang aku tu untuk jalan. Ce istighfar sikit

Jun 20, 2016

#328 Baju kurung

Today my dad praised me wearing baju kurung

"Elok kamu pakai baju kurung, erin. Cantik.. Nampak la feminin.."

I agree tho. Memang baju kurung lawa. Just that susah nak ada baju kurung yang aku suka. This one is gonna be my fav.

Jun 19, 2016

#327 Warcraft 2016

Can't get over the movie Warcraft. Love the plot. Love the placing like how things are at places yakno. Like how when you raid a town, and another town is also being raided. Like how it looks as tho others are healing m, regaining HP before continuing the attack. Like how it takes time for you to cast a spell. Like how a spell can be broken if it all fails. Like how the new guardian has leveled up. Like how it takes time for you to teleport to another place. Also how a spell can easily be casted upon a shallow minded person like how a Jedi can easily manipulate those with weak minded 😭😂

Love the casts too like omg Lothar is so handsome, his eyes!!! Blue sparkling eyes!! Oh I knew there would be something going on between him and gorano? I forgot her name. Just by the way he gets her dressed upnfor the war, I could see the sexual tension there 🙊

Khadgar at first I thought he doesn't fit the character like whybdin younpick a more hot guy but no, as the story goes, his feature really serves the character. And he is indeed good looking. I bet he will gain more popularity after that mlvie.

Love the female orc tho. Gorano (?). Nice choice. Reminds me of the woman char in Guardians of the Galaxy, which the similarity is both are niggas. But whatever. Love her.

I'm sad to see Durathon and Darka dead tho.

The king and queen not that fond of but okay.

Medivh!!!! Why do you have to be the bad guyyyy. I loved him.

Plot twist on the relationship between Gorano and Lothar, Gorano had to leave the person she loves to do what she had to do. She made a choice to gain trust from the orcs in order to save the human. The King was wise indeed. I could see if there are sequals, eventually Lothar and Gorano will be together.

And I really hate Guldan.


Feed goals achieved 😂😂

Jun 18, 2016


This is an example of kids tryna be adults like dude please enjoy your teenage life.

Maybe teenage life now is about being this pretty but you need to dig down the history and embrace it man. 



"So sleepy but refusing to sleep. Help."

Lol this is a silly thing to tweet. In this beautiful month especially, you should be doing good stuff. There are so many things to do, sis. I shouldn't complain 😂


In H&M in early April

Me: I'm gonna buy these socks coz there's a pair of green in it.
Atul: Motif?? Kau nak hijau, kau beli yang tu je la
Me: Too bad they don't sell separately


Do you understand how sad that you missed Ramadhan for half of the month?! Yes you don't eat like anybody else because it's better not to. But it is never the same to actually be able to fast and do stuffs when you're not having period. The excitent of Ramadhan, man! Haih

Jun 17, 2016


You know when you think people like the actors, the good looking flawless hot stuff people don't exist? And when you actually witness a person like that right before your eyes, it's the best gift from God seriously they are so gorgeous 


I googled denim on denim with '2016' coz I was feeling weird with the fashion 😂 since when I care what the trend is


Do you know the feeling of you actually want to know if your friend is reading your blog and the other blog? But then you actually don't want to know if they do read because it would be embarrassing for you, even though they are your close friends.

So I will just assume that they read.

If my friend can visit my Big Time Rush blog, why not my personal blog lol

#314 Materialistic

It was a call with A'an. I told her about me buying a fossil watch. She knows me well that I like not just cool stuff but also cool and hippie and those fossil types. That was when she said something like, "Awak ni sebenarnya materialistik tau. **then I can't remember what** Kalau boleh awak nak post semua gambar tu kan."

Oh A'an. You always say the things that are lingering in my mind for the longest time and since forever.

Like, you also said what I had in mind about me in MRSM and about how awesome Atul's voice is. Because even though we are close friends, I'm always the person who holds back my thoughts #shrugs.

ps I can't wait to dance around again ^-^


So today I came earlier to office like two and a half hours earlier. Just to ease away the guilt of days coming late to office lol Because actually I don't have much to do even if I'm early


Is it bad if it's easier for me to wake up with mom calling/texting me instead of physically tell me to WAKE UP FOR SAHOOR
But beforehand, 
Mom asked me on how should she wake me up for sahoor
Me: Just wake me up, like, 'Erin, sahur.' Let me respond with just one 'hm' then that's it. I will be responsible for what happens next.


Okay actually I don't really get this kind of people. Do they actually really care about likes? That I'd they were to post, anyone would even like their photo? Or reach a certain number? 

If they are being serious (anywho who are being serious about this), then this is very ill. 

Jun 15, 2016

#313 hipster niqabis?

Girl. Sorry. But I think you shouldn't  compare 2D with reali life? Is it fair that you compare yourself to 2Ds??? Tho idk much on the source/inspiration of the arts, still. (The last two photos are pretty but your pants, girl. Open your heart.)

Ada jugak yang kata tak nampak apa salahnya. Allahu. Aku ni ngkorang tengok memang laju je nak bash orang kan. Tapi saya tahu saya ni memang tak cukup modest lagi. Tak, jauh sangat.

But we need to right the attitude man. You represent Islam but you ignore it's essence. Isn't that ignorant?

It seems as though you are struggling too much to represent yourself. People keep judging you, you go rebel. Thus cussing and the attitude. Even sheikh or Nouman Ali Khan I can't remember, says, mind your words. Even if it's on Twitter, your own page, but there are witnesses and what more it is there forever unless you delete it.

I did cuss. I still do tho. It got worst because my close friends (and colleagues) are using it without care 😭 not to blame them but blaming myself for being so easily influenced lol

It's silly to show your raw unfiltered dirty thoughts to people tbh. It's already enough that Allah knows what you are thinking yakno.

So of course you can't judge people just because of their tweets and photos but you are showing what you want people to know... You are showing your own aib...? Feeling proud...? Idk

I always talk senselessly that if my thoughts go public, they will ruin me lol

This is like almost the same issue with 'modest' IG shops. I don't understand you

Jun 14, 2016


#311 bangi sentral

Lol haritu pergi reopening of Cattleya store tapi takde feel
Didn't even know it was a reopening of the shop. Didn't even realise I entered the shop named after it
Oh and I was kinda pissed off when shops don't display their names clearly. Especially above the door & inside the shop. C'mon
At least put a simple sign to know that that's your shop 🙄 branding, man. Branding.

#310 vote down

Vote down.


Remember the conference between PM and Obama? I was like whatever PM coz the way he talks was very uninteresting and lazy. But when Obama talks, I was attracted. He talks precisely, energetically tho slumberly and every word was clear. Well of course, coz he's American, that's his main language.

And so I was amazed. I thought I could be like him or at least better than PM. But when I hear myself talk, it's no wonder that people can hardly understand me that I need the energy to talk properly. But tbh people can hardly understand me in Malay so what more in English. 

Actually, I need to brush up the way I talk and everything else would follow

#308 Marissa

My niece always try to manja with me but I always refuse lol like kesian gak tapi I ain't gonna lose to you. Kids are spoiled I don't want them to get more spoiled and trouble me 🙄 

I know padan muka kalau dia tak nak dengar cakap aku. (I'm not good at making people listen to me anyway). But I'm just not the aunt who spoils my niece.  It would be sad tho coz it would make distance between family members but idk the least I could do is just be there if they need me 


Kids tryna look 25 but I just wanna be the old school 18, like the hippie 18 years old.

For technology, I understand, but the fashion tho. #shrugs

Jun 13, 2016


I need this. To remind me that my friends are funny af (actually banyak gila lagi conversation yang best. I'll make a mental note to ss those conv in the future)


Kah kah tak terasa pun keding, dah memang camtu. Then actually I didn't realise that baju kembang makes me look not skinny. Which is why I unconciously have always opted for that kind of dresses 🤔 

#304 audit VT

Lol I guess every senior feels the same way 

VT = vacation trainee (interns)

Jun 12, 2016


When Avi tweets stuffs that relate so much to your religion then you realise he's Jew, it makes sense, we have many things in common


More excited to see menswear coz they would look good on bae but then bae wouldn't care on how he looks 🙄


Yesterday: Ew nescafe kelapa????
Today: (as if last night was drunk) Wow. Nescafe COCONUT? Interesting #matsallehsangat


Pergi kedai siti khadijah dengan harapan yang terlampau tinggi but doesn't meet our expectations at all hm


Saiz XS okay tak fit tapi mak disapprove sebab nampak keping papan

Ok mak. Goodbye Paula top by imaan boutique 😢

Seriously tho the designs are nothing new but the fact that the quality of the fabric makes the dresses look sooo gorgeous no kidding


Me & mom
-mana satu eh
-beli la yang paling lain dari lain
-ok nak yang jeans sebab ada patch
-..yang peach tu la yang lain...

Then bila balik shopping physically, you go shopping online pulak 


When you unconciously do the left boob grab while laughing but you realise you're a girl and a muslim coz it's like downgrading your own religion which you supposed to be holy


Me when subuh in the morning.

Alarm clock the second azan comes up.
Reason: early prayer, earlier to go back to sleep, longer nap.

Then go to bathroom and take wudhu without switching on the lights, perform prayer without lights on.
Reason: Do things in the dark to reserve your sleeping vibe so that you would fall asleep easily after your subuh prayer

Perangai masyaAllah 😂


I know so many birthdays even my family but I refuse to wish idk what's wrong with me

Like why can't you make someone feel better despite your silly life principle 


Two styles

Turning a button down long shirt into a 'kimono' wrap

Wearing inner skirt (knee length) as outer skirt for when I wear shirts so that I cover my butt (this is actually inspired by my sister coz she wore really mini skirts but I can't coz they don't cover my thighs so I opt for the inner skirt)

Style 1: byfqi baru buat tahun ni
Style 2: I saw the IG shop this year but now sure since when they came up with that

So basically all I'm sayin is, my style is a way to go actually 😛 Sayang sebab itu style kita and tetiba ada orang guna tu untuk bisnes which kita boleh je femeskan style tu tapi sebab we are not business minded, takpe, tu rezeki dia 😊

Cam berlagak gila saying that they stole your style 😂 but I just want to say that we thought of it earlier hehehehe 😌


I have this We ❤️ Muhammad sticker at the back window car but my dad removed it might be coz the way we drive lol

Dia cam, kau drive macam syaiton pastu ada hati nak letak nama prophet saw, cam memburukkan nama Islam gituw


Okay honestly I'm not modest in my outfits. I wear pants like skinny pants. It's not tight but it shows how skinny my legs are yakno

So. What I understand in modest clothes is that you wear everything loose. Modest to me is not when you wear loose top and scarf that covers your chest and the back, but you wear skinny jeans/pants.

Like, whaaat? Business people please, when you have your motto, you go with it and not in contradict. I know you wanna be cool still applying your skater life in our clothing line but maybe you should reconsider your business motto.

Yes you can wear pants.
Even in sports, for your easy to go around, you can always opt to wear loose pants. So why not in your ads?


This kopiah query made me think. I was like, true tho, why actually? So I thought of the friendliness of the kopiah itself. It can be folded if they want to take it off. But do they even take if off? If not, songkok would be nice.

Against the opinion, I am to argue that nak jumpa Allah tak kisah aestathic ke tak. Janji ikhlas, bukan sebab nak tunjuk orang lain.

But also, nak jumpa Allah pun bagus to look your best. Kemas, suci dan bersih. Coz I read somewhere that a girl could wear the prettiest and modest dress to meet Allah. Janji tepati syara'. 

#290 mom has no chill

Mom has no chill when it comes to things are not in place and not tidied up immediately after you use it. 

I was gonna tell her I haven't cleaned up the table and chairs because I'm still here mom! Still using it?!?!?!?! Which you should know me well enough that I would  really do it before I go to bed

I mean I'm furious coz she's being stressed on these petty things

Gosh I can't complain tho (yea maybe only complain here where nobody actually reads)


When you have a crush on someone which you two know each other, you rant somewhere else instead

And you always want to understand their tweets, googling them so that you know what's up or try to understand, or listen to songs he tweets, videos he RTs 😂


Idk man geram gak tengok comments yang kata laki tu hodoh. Tbh I can see that he has good looks and especially taste of style, if you are referring to external attraction.

I agree that he is not the white hunk perfect square jaw whatever you imagine her boyfriend to be (I always judge couples tbh but must always reflect myself that it is possible and they know each other that others don't)

I'm so furious man. Ugh. Ok so maybe some comments are just playin around but you just end it like that, making people like me furious of your shady comments 

And beauty is always subjective I hate people


Idk man geram gak tengok comments yang kata laki tu hodoh. Tbh I can see that he has good looks and especially taste of style, if you are referring to external attraction.

I agree that he is not the white hunk perfect square jaw whatever you imagine her boyfriend to be (I always judge couples tbh but must always reflect myself that it is possible and they know each other that others don't)

I'm so furious man. Ugh. Ok so maybe some comments are just playin around but you just end it like that, making people like me furious of your shady comments 

And beauty is always subjective I hate people

#287 "Senior Project"

At first I was like why an Asian looking hero??? But then as I saw him smile, damn, he's gorgeous!

But the thing I am confused with this movie is that,

Peter likes Sam from the beginning. The way he looks at her in his first class. It also seems like he knows the blond is the bad guy here but he didn't resist the kiss and he is still dating the blond? Why don't guys just turn down a girl when they don't like them, even tho the girl could be so possessive?

Anyway I understand how Spencer is so jealous when he saw his ex kissing Peter. Spencer still likes her! Also I'm glad they really take teenagers to act as 18 years old in the movie. Not like like other TV drama series like the OC blergh

Jun 11, 2016


Okay I already regret of not buying the plain wide shawls from Imaan Boutique. 1 for RM39, 4 for RM100 :( That's RM25 per shawl and I'd save RM14 😭

But I need to be real, I don't like bright colours because I afraid it would still be translucent and what not

(Um yes I'm still in regret 😂)


"As Salamu‘Alaikum wbt
(May Peace and Mercy and Blessings of Allah be Upon You)

May this message reach you with the best Imaan and health

Hereby attached your tracking number
Please read the return policy thoroughly if you are dissatisfied with our product.


Please paste the above code here

Thank you for your purchase and support, we appreciate if you
could share your picture if you love wearing it.

Jazakillah khayr
May Allah ease your journey in this dunya and hereafter"

Jsyk, I have posted on IG, two photos wearing byfiq's shawl but of course these  business persons are very picky, choosing what they think is appropriate for their marketing.

Guess what, I was not featured. It's like whatever man. If you don't accept those kind of pictures then whatever 🙄

I still buy from them tho, still support. Just that, these things happen in business #shrugs


This post about my junior

 I just realised that his twithandle is "Brad Pitt"?????????
Is he reading my blog or people just always relate him to Brad Pitt agsdjhfkgaskhdf




Does it ever occur to you that sometimes if you are focusing on something else other than your faeces, they won't very much corporate with you


I post so many entries in early 2015. Why? Coz of this senior that I had a crush on. And actually early this year 2016 I also have a crush on another senior, from another race and religion. (Whom actually I already stalked since last year..... Wait no, I only remember him in the new office so it means I started stalking him since this year.. WAIT. We moved office last September 2015 so it could be since last year. Whatever it is, I'm sure it's already long enough.)

So in the end like omg thankfully I got into the same team with him 😭😭😭 I was and still so happy?!?! He's so handsome I can't. He's always so smiley even when I did so many mistakes 😭 maybe coz I'm a girl that's why he never showed his fierce side.

I'm not sure why I was not actively posting about him but...

Idk how he can be so gorgeous even when his face is not flawless? Like he has these pimples but still so handsome like wow masyaAllah brother 😂

Anyway I hope bae understands this 😘


Coz my cousin is cool af

#279 Poslaju guna beg plastik sendiri

So this was my first time to post something via courier with Poslaju, using my own plastic wrap. Actually there are three layers. The cloth bag, and two plastics. I only did two layers of celophone tape. And when I posted over the counter and he took away the package, I immediately became nervous and paranoid, that I thought I should have taped them with more layers yakno. Coz I saw complaints on poslaju that the packages were torn apart and I don't want my customer to receive the parcel that way what more if on the way it is damaged?!

But ya Allah, alhamdulillah. 

My customer said she is very satisfied with the condition! I might have underestimated my own stuff, how I take care of my stuff lol I think it deserved a 9/10 condition with slight higher price.

Anyway alhamdulillah rezeki jangan kedekut bakhil 😊🙌🏼

Jun 10, 2016


They say you need to wait not more than a week to change to new facial products so while I'm waiting I feel so naked


When you play something then no audio comes out, you're worried that your phone's speaker is broke, to know that your earphone is attached


"You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, including yourself."

So I'm so easily influenced by the poeple on Twitter and I 'hang out' with them quite frequently so yeah. All my inner 'best la siak' 'gile la syall' 'wtf' 'wtaf' 'fleek af' are because of them. (Before, it was tumblr but now it's Twitter haha)
And I pinpoint bad words coz I'm js


Jun 9, 2016

#275 musically

Tru sheet hahah


First I was like, yes, they both would be dead in the end. But then, the characters are much better than them 😒

#273 milky way

Man, I really love his photography skills. First saw him on IG from baakk then saw his famous tweet on Twitter. @emaneous

Jun 4, 2016


I'm not that excited for food but I'm excited for hipster cafes for the coffees

Also I'm not that excited for the food a place could offer, but the breath taking sight it has