May 31, 2011

Hidup #6

Sekukuh mana pun tembok yang dapat menahan ombak kepedihan yang menggelapar dalam dada, ia akhirnya runtuh jua!

May 30, 2011

I could not sleep throughout that night... pt. 2

The second I turned to my left, a puma look-alike was about to leap at me, roaring, making its many layers of teeth visible. Yet with a speed of light, I jumped to the other side as to dodge its attack. I fell with a hard bump. It was painful but the beast was not about to give up.

I took a branch that lay on the floor which happened to have a sharp end and stood up. The beast gritted its teeth and I made the first move. I jerked the rather heavy branch towards the beast. Instead, the beast bit the branch and tried to shake if off my hands.

As I struggled, I thought, ‘Friday. It is the day that mother told me not to ever step into the woods on this particular day.’ She never told me why but now I got it.

An ancient story said that the beast was actually beyond a man’s fight. Without further due, I let the ranch go and broke into a run. I did not know where I was heading because fear rushed through me. I tried not to trip over the obstacles on the ground or a branch on my head. Adrenaline rush really helped me to survive.

I did not dare to turn around but just ran like a wind. When I saw an open end, I was the happiest person in the world. I kept running and the moment I saw something familiar about the open end, I tried to stop. Yet inertia kept me moving forward and when I did, I was actually jumping off a cliff to see a vast sea before me. I could hardly scream as I was approaching the water with an increasing velocity.

As the water seemed closer, I embraced myself and entered the sea with a big splash. Fortunately my three years of swimming class helped me to get my head above the water.

With a superior strength, I swam to the shore with a furious speed. As I reached the shore, I panted really hard. It was as if jumping from a frying pan into a fire! I looked high up above and saw the beast at the cliff. I could not believe that the cliff was extremely high, and I had survived the jump, without breaking any of my bones. I believed that no normal human could possibly survive that. That was why this terrifying tragedy made me wide awake, unbelieving of the truth.

May 29, 2011

Hidup #5

Amat kekok mendepani anak-anak. Tak tahu bagaimana harus bertindak dan bergaul, apa yang harus kuperbual dan apa yang tak boleh. Kalau dengan rakan sebaya atau remaja seusia Anita, tentu saja aku boleh berkasar atau mengejek. Tapi kalau dengan anak-anak kecil, dapatkah aku buat demikian?

May 28, 2011

Hidup #4

Tak mungkin kuceritakan perasaanku yang sebenarnya kepada sesiapa, apatah lagi pada orang yang baru kukenal. Itu memang sikapku yang biasa – berbohong, berpura itu juga perlu dalam hidup ini. Persahabatan boleh musnah jika terlalu berterus terang.

Words (essay) pt. 2

Before the day got dark, I decided to leave the pond, still hoping my father would stop trying to be my best friend. When I entered my house, it was eerily quiet.

“Dad?” I called him out, but there was no response. I went into the guest room – the place where he would always be.

“Dad?” I called him again as I slowly pushed the ajar door. I was too shocked to see what was before me until I could feel myself turned pale. He was lying on the floor, unmoved.

“DAD?!” I dropped my bag and shook him to wake him up. Floodgates of emotion were opened with sadness. I assured myself that there was still a ray of hope. With the knowledge I had, I listened to his heart beat. Nothing could be heard.

“NO! You cannot leave me!” I cried and shook him more vigorously. My eyes were burry and watery with tears.

“How could you leave me without giving me a chance to make amends for my sin to you?” I said to his dead body with wavery voice. What I said before I left the house must have given him a heart attack, because then only I remembered that he had a high blood pressure. My words must have affected him profoundly. He died and I was not there. I abandoned him.

When logic came to me, I called the ambulance. Funeral was made and the neighbours came over to pay condolescence. I was devastated by his death. My neighbours didn’t know what really happened. There was no need for them to know as I was really ashamed of myself.

Now, there was nothing I could do to reverse his death. When I flashed back, he actually looked good in the t-shirt and the three-quarter pants.

“My handsome father...,” I whispered to myself. He should not die at such young age. Yet still, those were the last words I said. I knew by then that words could kill.

As I watched Joe and Kylar playing, I was determined not to disappoint them and to think twice before I say anything. I just could not bear another loss of my beloved ones.

May 27, 2011

Take it back

Remember when I sarcastically said,
And so we parted to our own ways. Tak kesah pun. There's another more than six months seeing each other.
I actually really care now. Dude, I miss you :'|

Hidup #3

Segalanya adalah pura-pura. Berpura-pura pada diriku sendiri. Berpura-pura tabah dengan cara menekan perasaanku jauh ke dalam hatiku, tak nampak pada mata orang lain tetapi ia menyeksakan diam-diam bagai api dalam sekam, tanpa siapa pun mengerti, tanpa siapa dapat fahami.